Coin Purse

I don't want to admit this but since I wouldn't be able to see you snicker, I might just as well say that I have been putting my bills in a paper envelope and coins in an empty Godiva tin can for the past year or so.  So every time I purchase something, I hid the torn envelopes and tin can inside the bag while getting my my money.  The reason being my old wallet was too bulky even if there's almost nothing in it.

I was with my sister while I was looking at wallets in the mall.  I finally realized that I need a real purse.  Unfortunately, my sister got nothing nice to say about my taste in my choice of wallets.  

So yesterday, she handed me a purse she bought herself.  She told me to use it instead.  I'm the older sister and I'm receiving hand me downs from her.  Pathetic?  No. Just grateful.  

Here, I'm just playing around with the cam.   Look at my point-and-shoot cam.

Inside, it has slots for three credit cards too.

It could also fit a small cellphone.

Baby's Dining Experience

Where in the world will there be someone to carry you while you dine?  Where would you find a place where you are being sung to sleep while you take your meal?  And where can you be cuddled and held so close after finishing everything and being waited on until you burp?

Nowhere else but in our mothers' arms.  Too bad we don't remember any of it when we are finally able to form memories (and that would be at 3 to 4 years of age).

I was thinking about this while feeding my Via awhile ago.  It's too bad she won't even remember me singing and humming to her.  If only I could record every hum I make during feeding time then probably I would have composed something as great as those of Debussy or James Horner.

I have hummed the following songs:

• mellow dramatic version of Bahay Kubo (LOL!)
• Anima Christi
• I Love You Lord
• Our Father
• St.Francis Prayer/Song

And the rest were just made up as I go along.  (Para na ring nagsimba ang baby ko LOL!)  

Awhile ago, I also tried singing the lyrics and mouthing the words.  I noticed she was looking at my mouth and frowning a bit.  When she started to cry, I came back to humming.  LOL!  Momma's got a lot of practicing to do, I know!

Day 1 of 32

Started Day 1 of training today.  I was calling home every now and then to check up on Via.  I even heard her coo once.  I truly wish I was walking distance away from home so that I can see my daughter during breaks.  But I have to do my best to trust the nanny to do her job even without me actually seeing that she does.

I told her not to rock my Via to sleep because there's a great possibility that she will vomit her food especially when she's full.  I checked up on Via's laundry basket and I saw that she had undergone many shirt changes today.  That just means that she soiled her shirts because of vomiting.  Darn it!  I have taken care of Via myself and noticed that the pile of dirty shirts almost turned to none in 12 hours which just means she almost don't vomit her milk at all.

Dear Lord, there are 10 more days of these before the old nanny comes back from vacation.

Anyway, training started today and it was all about getting acquainted with each other.  The trainer couldn't remember my name but he can remember my age.  And whenever he looks at me, he is trying to remember by saying my age out loud.  (Yes I'm that old.)  And I told him that I wouldn't mind being called "32" if he can't remember my name.  So now he keeps calling me "32".  And that's how the others remember me too.

They keep trying to figure out why I only had my daughter at this age.  I wasn't telling if they got it right.  And it's fun hearing them make up stories about me and wondering if they finally did figure it out.

Getting Back on the Saddle Again

Training starts tomorrow for my new work.  Hopefully, I can hack it.  I'm still waiting for that other application I made but while I'm waiting, I wanted to start training for work already if ever I can't land my preferred job.  

With all the excitement, I am still very anxious because I'm going to have to leave my Via with her not-so-new nanny.  Tomorrow will be the first time I'm going to leave Via for almost 10 hours.  If only I could go home during the break.  The not-so-new nanny is starting taking care of Via tonight with my supervision but tomorrow,  she will be alone with Via all day.  

I already gave some pointers to remember which is as follows:

• Always wash hands (and arms) before handling Via or her feeding apparatuses (excuse me for lack of better term).
• Prepare 3 ounces of milk each feeding time - no more (to avoid any wasted milk) and no less (to avoid having Via cry due to lack of milk).
• Dispose milk after three hours if not consumed 
• Only use the pacifier when she is still hungry but her tummy can't handle any more milk.
• Feed if three hours has passed and if Via hasn't asked for food
• Turn on/off the air conditioning as needed.  Make sure Via doesn't feel too cold or too hot.
• Make sure the TV volume is not too loud when Via is asleep.
• Use the mobile (toy) when Via is crying even after feeding
• Change diaper as needed or every three hours (I'm switching to Huggies soon and never going to buy Pampers ever again).
• Make sure to position Via in the most comfortable way possible.  Make sure her back is straight and not curved/hunched when sleeping.  
• During poopoo time: prepare everything first before opening the dirty diaper.
• Make sure there's nothing that will cover her face or that surrounds her neck to avoid asphyxiation. 

I'm still thinking of other reminders.

Easier

For the past three months, the maximum period of sleep I get in twenty four hours was five hours or less.  I have been reprimanded for the way I take care of my baby for people who think they know better.  They have been telling me that I should go to sleep when she does.

Before my baby changed her milk to lactose-free type of formula, she has been vomiting her milk incessantly.  It becomes more problematic when she does it in her sleep.  Even if we elevate her pillow, milk seems to regurgitate upwards out of her mouth and even her nostrils.  The even more problematic part is that she doesn't make a sound loud enough for people to hear her.  

That was how she was before.  And that is the main reason why I prefer being awake even if she is sleeping.   Or if I was to go to sleep, I would ask someone to take my post beside her side of the bed. (I'm so scared she'll aspirate and get pneumonia in the process.)

After she changed her milk to lactose-free formula, she still vomits her milk but now, it's not too often unlike before.  We also let her cry in the morning so that she can finally use her vocal cords.

And now, she rarely vomits (doctor says she has finally developed her upper GI tract) and she now cries loudly.  And I can go to sleep at last (while she is asleep).   Since I am more agile than ever for the past 3 months (after the CS), I can run to her side for every whimper I hear from her.  

I am so in tune now with my baby.  And I feel more competent as a mother.

Curfew

I went out tonight to watch Tangled with my brother and sister.  It was four hours spent away from my Via.  Because of that four hours I got an earful from Via's papa.  He always does that to me every time I go out at night.  I think it is his pet peeve when his wife is out past 6pm.

He is more strict than my own dad.  Geez!

His reason:  Via is not yet old enough to be left alone.  I understand his concern because it is my concern too.  But I have to address my need of having some "me" time too.  I know there's no room for being so selfish now that I'm a mother but I think Via would also like me to keep my sanity.

After being scolded for the past thirty minutes or so on the phone, I spent trying not to apologize.  Instead, I'm trying to justify my four hours off duty.  I didn't say sorry for what I've done especially since I made sure she got everything she needs and was calling her nanny every now and then to check up on them.

I love my daughter.  And I realize that going out without her does not mean I love her less.

It would be bad if this happens too often.  But I'm not planning to do this on most days.  I'm not going to be one of those mothers who leave their children without a care in the world just because the nanny is there to do her job.  But I'm not also going to be one of those mothers who puts her life on hold just because she had a kid.  I'm not going to be one of those who lose her own person.

I understand the need for a curfew.  My husband wants me home by 6pm if I'm not working.  Maybe that isn't so bad at all.  But I might just extend it just a little if I find the need to have a little rest sometimes.

Almost Three Months

In pictures:

Uh oh! She can now roll to her side.  I got to watch her closely or she might fall of her bed.  I'm now thinking that she has to transfer to her crib soon.  Too bad for me.  I like her sleeping beside me.

Forget Me Not Papa

I was with Via's Papa yesterday.  He was asking if there were new photos of his daughter in my phone.  I regrettably said no because I was rushing the morning before we met.

Sometimes I wonder if my BF will eventually lose connection with his daughter because they have been separated ever since.  It's not normal that my BF don't have the chance to take care of her (which is the ultimate form of bonding in these first few months).

I asked him yesterday if he still feels close to his daughter during the very few times they have the chance to meet.  And he said always.  He assured me that whenever he looks at Via's old photos and videos, he still feels the same longing for his kid.

I don't mind if my bf doesn't miss me as long as he misses his kid.  That is more than enough, if you ask me.

Yaya Going On Vacation

Sigh! Trying to deal with an upcoming problem.  How on earth am I going to find a temporary replacement that I trust that well to take care of my daughter?  

My current nanny is so well-trained that she sometimes reminds me herself of stuff I have to do for my kid.  Also, she knows how meticulous I am when it comes to child care that she already has adapted those ways too. So it is so sad (for me) that she has to leave for a two-week long vacation when I am about to go to work in a matter of days.  

I tried contacting my nephew's previous yaya but unfortunately, she has already changed phone numbers and is unreachable.  There's someone available but I'm quite sure she hasn't handled someone as young as my Via before so I am having second thoughts.  There's another one who just sent me a text message awhile ago but the problem is she is three months pregnant.  It's too bad because I could have gotten her as a temporary replacement because she was Via's first ever yaya.  (Yup in three months time, there's already two nannies who handled my Via because the first one got herself pregnant and had to find a replacement.)

Mobile Fun

We still haven't made use of the crib I bought last November 2010 because Via is still sleeping beside me in my bed.  So when we bought a mobile toy for her, there's nowhere to hang it to.  Therefore, I have to hold the mobile up myself... or if there's anyone willing to do it too.  I think I let her enjoy the mobile twice to thrice a day 30 minutes each session LOL!  Arms really hurt after.  But seeing how she enjoys it so much, I forget about the arm pain.

Her reactions to her toy.

Pakimkim

I have a question regarding the monetary gifts during the baptism.  What should I do with it?

I was told that it was lucky for the kid to receive pakimkims.  Is it also lucky to spend or keep it as keepsakes?  I find it weird to have bills as keepsake.  But if it's what superstition says then I'll keep them instead of spending them. 

Umm, does anyone have any idea?

Via's New Stuff

Since it was laundry day, I opened Via's baptism gifts thinking that some may be clothes that should also be laundered so that she can use them before she outgrows all of them. The immediate need to use the gifts were not so because some of them are big enough for one year olds...

                                                       and even two- or three-year olds.

Even though it seems some of the clothes are too nice to use at home, we will probably use it even if Via isn't going anywhere.  I've been advised to use even the nicest ones at home or else they will not be put into use at all.  A young girl like Via has no social life and doesn't go out that much often so there's not much need for playsuits and the like.

Therefore, Via is going to look good even if she is just in bed.  LOL!  She can spill milk all over them, for all she cares. 

I opened another box and found this sweet pink and white plain shirts.  She also got a bib and mittens even though Via is not using them anymore. 

                                                 
                                                           Oh, it also came with a rattle.

Blue and Pink dresses big enough for one year olds.  I prefer Via received bigger clothes because I don't want her to outgrew any of them that fast. 

                                         I found the card attached to the gift bag so very cute.
                                                 At this age, I still love pastel colors LOL!

  
         She got another pair of shoes.  Now, this I wonder if I should let her wear it even when she's home.

 Honestly, when I opened the package below, I got so excited.  I love the combination pink and brown and the shade is just perfect.  I love this really.  Sorry, can't help myself.  It reminds me of the Meiji box of strawberry chocolates we find in the supermarkets. 

              
          It's much better when it was unwrapped.  It's a baby bag so there's a lot of pockets inside and out.

Via thanks all of you who put thought into their gifts.

Via's Baptism

2-12-11
11am
Sto.Domingo Church, Quezon Ave. Quezon City
12pm
Romulo Cafe, Sct Tuason QC

My baby's baptism in pictures.

Off to church.

I woke up late and Via's nanny didn't bother waking me up when it was already an hour and a half before the baptism.  We bathe Via the fastest way possible before we got dressed ourselves.  My plan to wear my hair down that day after I iron it out wasn't possible anymore.  I had it in my usual ponytail.  Too bad. 

I still had the anti-usog bracelet with me. I forgot to put it around Via's ankles that day.  And now, I wonder where it is.  I hope I didn't lose it entirely because I don't want to go back to Quiapo just to buy that.

My bestfriend's hubby Alvin and my brother Gen was ready to take pictures of Via when she got out of the car.  So funny, like she was a debutante.  LOL!  And so nice of them because I wasn't in able to do it myself that time.

                                          Registration in Sto.Domingo's Parish office.

Our family picture. 

It's too bad "hubby" didn't bother smiling at the camera.  I knew he wasn't comfortable surrounded by people who he thinks think badly of him.  I think he only talked to me, to my bestfriend, to my bestfriend's hubby and to my friend, Jong.  He didn't have to say it out loud but I knew he felt very small especially after what my parents did and said to him.

By the way, that's mama (his mother) behind us.  She got dressed up and had her hair done the previous day just for this event.  So sad, she couldn't stay longer with us.   

                                         My sister, her hubby and my nephew with the nanny.

My cousin who keeps taking away our baby from my "hubby's" arms.  Shame on you.

She is really a very nice person.  I don't know why this time, she just couldn't let us be.  I still love her though.  She is still my favorite cousin among all others I have (and that's a lot of cousins, I tell you).  In time she will see that my hubby is not as bad as they thought him to be. 

I wanted this picture printed out, enlarged and framed.  It's almost perfect.

My bestfriend and her husband. 

Cake from Dexter's. 

My mom ordered it for Via.  It was the first time I saw the cake and it was so pretty.  We were supposed to serve it to the guests that day but there were so much left of the desserts we ordered from the restaurant.

Kaligayahan Room a.k.a. Brown Room LOL!

                        They got us cornered.  I wonder why we all cramped in that corner for this picture. 

Kasiyahan Room. 

Everyone's almost done with the lunch.

My friends all in the Kapayapaan room. 

It lived up to its name.  We were left alone to ourselves.  They weren't there when I made a scene in the church.  So, nobody talked about it.  My bestfriend and hubby were smart enough not to mention it to others. 

                                                            My parents. Period.

                 
                                                                   Kasiyahan Room

                                                             My sister and her son.

I wish I had my own family picture taken in this room too that day.  It's just too bad people won't let me.

Someday, we will hold another baptism.  One that we paid for.  And one that Via's papa can celebrate with us after.  Looking forward to it.