Sunday, June 26, 2011

No Work Monday

I declared today as non-working non holiday.  I woke up at the same time I wake up during weekdays, but I remained lying down in bed for a couple of minutes when I decided that I wasn't going to work today.  I'm going to have the nanny have her day off today because she ain't going to have any during the coming weekend.  I"m going to take off on Friday and I need her to be here (and contented) taking care of my daughter.

So today, Via gets my unadulterated attention.

She's still asleep though.  And I'm heading down for breakfast.  She sleeps longer now that she sleeps in her crib.  I don't miss her that much anymore... without her beside me in bed.  But I do get up every time I hear her stirring in her crib.

So Via, get ready, because I have a busy day planned for us... but I do hope you sleep every now and then so that mommy can get some sleep too.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Mall Rats

Well, we were yesterday.  We weren't really going to buy anything except lunch but there were 11 of us.  We bought the whole gang.  This included my grandparents, my daughter, my sister's son, their corresponding nannies, and my sister and brother.

We had lunch at Sushiya and then my grandfather left along with the driver to spend some time in the casino somewhere.  And the rest of us were left to roam the mall.  My grandmother keep entering shoe shops because she had to sit down.  It's too bad there were no shoes that I liked in those shops.  It's not really so bad.

And then we had to stop by at Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf to meet up with the others.

I wasn't able to catch up on my reading assignments like I was supposed to do yesterday.  We had a fruitless but nevertheless, fun time at the mall.

While we were getting ready, I had to take some photos.
These were the first or many after turning seven months old the other day.

Masarap ba yan anak?  Patikim naman!

Oh my! Big baby ka na anak ko :)

Look at the crazy look in her eyes!
She looks so happy... and up to something!

Our group while waiting for our orders in Sushiya.

Grandma, Via and Me.  

Friday, June 24, 2011

Rainy Saturday

No work today.  Thank goodness.

Via is now using her crib.  I miss her terribly in bed.  I am the one having separation anxiety instead of the other way around.

Rain hasn't stopped since yesterday afternoon. I pity those who have their areas submerged in flood waters.  I was awaken up gust of winds against our windows and even the bedroom door made some racket.  Good thing, Via is still enjoying her deep sleep.

There were momentary black out.  I got up to charge my phone at once.  I really don't know if there's going to be a longer black out today.  Better make sure the battery's working.

I called husband before 6am asking him if he still had to go to work. He said yes.  Since there's no stopping him, I told him to hail a cab instead of riding a jeepney.  And I told him to bring the golf umbrella instead of my umbrella.  Also, I told him to bring boiled eggs teehee!  Just in case there were no restaurants open.  (OA na)  I don't want him stranded and hungry at the same time.  He assured me he has everything under control and that I should go back to bed while Via is still asleep.  In other words, I need to stop bugging him like I'm his mother.  teehee!

Sunday, June 19, 2011

To Smoke or Not Too Smoke?

It is all up to my husband whether I smoke or not.  

I have been asking him to gradually quit smoking since last year for our daughter's sake.  I think he went as far as reducing it to three sticks a day. He also tells me that he never finishes a stick.  

I was on the phone talking to him awhile ago.  I heard him buying cigarettes.  And then I told him calmly that someone is asking me at work to hang out and smoke during our breaks.  I told him that I would take the invite and start smoking too.  Since he can't stop, maybe I should start.

He then gave me a violent reaction that it's not good for me because I'm a woman and it doesn't look good when women do that.  And then I told him that our lungs are one and the same anatomically and functionally and our gender has nothing to do with it.  

And so, I heard him tell the lady in the sari-sari that he changed his mind about the cigarette.  

If he happens to tell me again that he smoked a couple, I would tell him that I would do the same thing the next day.  And then I'll make a report that I did smoke (even if I didn't).  

Hope this works!  Crossing my fingers!

First Father's Day

Well, it is for my daughter.  And it was a really sad occasion for both Via and me because we couldn't spend it with Via's dad.

We were both in Tagaytay with my parents.  I thought that it was really important to spend it with grandfather and my father.  I think they deserve to be celebrated on this day since they have proven themselves already in that job description.  They earned it.

On the other hand, even though my husband hasn't proved it yet (mostly because he hasn't been given that much of a chance) I thought it was sad that Via wasn't there with him to make him feel that he truly is a father on this day.

My husband has been at work the whole day.  His job is mostly busy on holidays and Sundays.  And today wasn't an exception.  We have been planning that when we returned this afternoon from Tagaytay, Via and I were going to a nearby fast food restaurant to join Via's dad for dinner.  Unfortunately, the weather wasn't so great (thanks to Egay).  And there was a tennis game scheduled late in the evening already.

The day went well except for some moments when I was reminded that my family doesn't recognize that Via also has a father.  It was very offensive the way they reminded my sister to call my nephew's father to say Happy Father's day.  They of course didn't bother to tell me that I should do the same.

I thought that anything against Via's father was against Via.  And anything against Via is against me (and her dad).

So sad today, as I think about all of these things.  It was very unfortunate that my own family has to endure this kind of set up.

But you know, when I think about it,  whenever I feel this way, the stronger my resolution that someday, when we are able, we can live with Via's father and it will be more peaceful and NORMAL for all of us.



It's hard to start a family without money.  But when I think about it, I wouldn't be able to start one if I waited for myself or Via's dad to be financially ready.  There's just this fear of what might happen if one of us gets sick... God forbid that Via gets sick.  And I don't know if my parents are willing to help out if that happens. I don't really care if I have to beg to anyone to save Via... I don't have that much pride.  But what if, in this greatest need, everyone will refuse to help us.  That is what I fear most.  Food and shelter is not a problem.  And the basic needs are at hand.  But if a catastrophe like that happens, I don't know what I will do.  I don't think we have enough money to send anyone of us to the doctor if there was a need.


Anak, smile for the camera!
(taken today at Josephine's Tagaytay during our family luncheon)

In spite of  everything in my head right now, today was relatively a good day.

Alas! We got a smile.

Happy Father's Day to all fathers!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Hele or Hilo?

It is against my rules to carry Via and gently rock her to sleep.  I've always been afraid that she will get used to it and would ask for it all the time. I'm thinking that she won't be as light as she is now in the future.  And so, to spare me back aches in the upcoming months, I don't make hele (slowly rocking a baby to sleep).

Last weekend, we were back in my husband's place.  And my husband took care of my baby as promised.  He was reprimanding me why I can stand my baby crying when I can just cradle her and rock her to sleep as he does.  And for the nth time, I explained to him why.

But then at one point, when Via was crying while I was in the room with her and my hubby was in the kitchen preparing our lunch, he told me to try out his hele technique.  Because the pacifier and the milk bottle just wouldn't work, and the diaper has been changed already, and I don't see any other reason why she seemed so irritated at something, I finally carried her and tried to gently rock her to sleep.  In less than five minutes, she was knocked out.

I was really amazed at this technique and my husband had to smirk telling me silently "I told you so".  Before, I thought that the reason why a baby will fall asleep this way is because dizziness or hilo.  But then, I don't think my gentle rocking for less than five minutes could have made my daughter dizzy enough to make her fall asleep.

I have to hand it to my husband.  He barely sees his daughter but he understands her completely.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

What A Mess

I took a look at my dresser shelves and somehow, I realize that I haven't dusted off or organize my stuff for a long time.  This reflects the rest of our bedroom.  It's about time I make time for cleaning up around my room.  And I'm going to start with this area.

Will post the aftermath of the cleaning up.

Must Moisturize

I could not reiterate it enough that we all need to moisturize.  If we can even moisturize our bottoms, we should.  All the lotions that you don't use up anymore, we should dry up the bottles empty by putting generous amounts in all the places that we take for granted.

Of course, the face is the least of all places we forget.  And so, when Body Shop gave away some free stuff, I was happy that they gave out some moisturizer for me to take home.

I use it every morning (alternate to Olay) right after I wash my face.  After it dries up, I put on loose powder and blush (Oh yes! Nag level up na ko... I now use blush) before I head out of the house to go to work.

I don't know if there's any visible effect right now.  But I believe there will be in the long run.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Honey You're My Last Stop

Last night, my husband was reprimanding me over the phone when he heard me saying "Crap! Crap! Crap!"  (aka Sh/t x3!).  He said he never wants me to say foul words like that.  I rolled my eyes because he couldn't see me over the phone.  He was really serious about it and gave me a litany of why I should not do that again.  I said that I wasn't saying that in front of our daughter and besides, it's a word more subtle than saying the usual foul words other people say.

We had two fights this week.  I don't remember the other one.  It always ends up into a banter which sometimes are not friendly, over the phone.  I think we miss each other so much that the situation frustrates us so much.

Next weekend, he said, I shouldn't break my promise of staying with him at our apartment and I should make sure to bring Via with me.  He misses our daughter so much.  And I feel guilty of not staying there as I have promised (for fear of getting on my mother's bad side again).

I was thinking as I was in bed last night, that I have to make all of this work.  Everyone keeps saying that it is up to me. And I have decided that I needed to set it up so that everyone will have to be happy about my decision.  But of course, it seems impossible for my parents but still, it's worth a try.

I'm choosing to build my own family with Via's father.  He doesn't know it although he hopes for it, that he is my last stop.  He is my choice.  Not because we have a daughter together, but because he really is who I'm looking for.  I think we are a perfect fit.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Via at 6 Months

She's starting to craw and grab things within her sight.
And everything should go in her mouth these days.
I'm afraid she's putting nonfood on her mouth without us noticing.




I'm just happy sitting here and watching people walk past me.