Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Single Moms Not Welcome

I'm already starting my pre-residency tomorrow but I wanted to try applying in a more "benign" workplace.  And so when I was called for an interview in one of our military hospitals (there are two of them in Manila), I readily went there hoping to be given a slot in their residency program.

There were four of us who are going to fight for a position.  When it was my turn for an interview, I calmly took my seat where the air-conditioner was blasting cold air directly.  And so calm turned into nervousness.  But it wasn't for long.

In the first two minutes, the panel learned that I was a "single" mom.  I didn't have a chance.  They went on a litany on why they are not choosing a mother of a 9-month old child.  And then, one of the panel even emphasized that I was single - that there was no father around to help me support my child.  I didn't bother elaborating my real situation - that the father is not living with us but is financially supporting us in one way or another.  The interviewer's tone made it clear to me that I wasn't welcome in their department just because I was a "single mother".

Nervousness turned into resentment.

I wished I didn't waste any more time.  Applicants should have been informed on Day 1 that Single Mothers are not welcome.  I shouldn't have wasted my time taking their exam.

But it's not a total waste.  At least I learned that there are some people who don't have any faith in Single Mothers.  I don't take it against them if they grew up in a perfectly established family.  Instead, I envy them.  They are so lucky to be able to have a "complete" family of their own.

Wait, I grew up in a "complete" family too but I don't think single mothers are less of a person than other people.  I think (WITHOUT BIAS) that real single mothers are great by themselves.

I just wish the interviewers could have given me a chance because whatever I said during the interview, they keep getting back at being a mother and a "single" one at that.


  1. Its wrong what they did. Its against the law to discriminate against people regardless of race, gender, school, status in life, etc. Shame on them!

    Being in Human Resources also entails that you represent your company to the best of your ability. If this is what their HR looks like, then you should be lucky you weren't picked.

  2. Discrimination indeed. Tsk. Their loss sis, not yours. Don't mind that you didn't get the job. You're too good for them.

  3. UNFAIR!!! Focus on this instead..
    Identify What Gives You Strength
    how have you handled challenging times in your life? What most energizes you and reminds you that you possess the strength needed to meet the current challenge? Focus on what has worked for you in the past.

    GOD can give YOU new life..not them

  4. Take it as a blessing in disguise sis. :)

  5. What the hell? What they did was beyond wrong! They ought to be ashamed of themselves!

  6. That so unfair! I would've erupted in anger if I were in your place.